Hello readers,

Today this might be a long post so please bear with me and as always please keep in mind that I’m sure there will be many typos, but I’ve been busy recently. (If I hadn’t been this post would have been nearly a week ago)

So recently I became aware of the kerfuffle that had arisen from Muslim Bushido’s recent post that called out a certain blog and her recent posts.  (A post by Muslim Bushido that I agree with completely and found to be very illumination, (especially when I had my own reservations about certain things on the blog she was talking about) (If you notice I don’t link that particular blog anymore)


On this other blog there have been many ruminations that BWE writers (Evia, Halima, Faith, and Khadija) a bunch of women who simply like to spend their time creating posts that undermine the *thriving* black “community”. Not only are BWE writers sabotaging and turning their backs on the black community that has always been there for black women but the women who find that their views align with said writers are simply young, misguided women who need answers from a very reliable middle aged woman, are too stupid to make wise decisions on their own, or a simply selfish, grubby, white cock hungry women deluded into believing that black women who support or believe BWE writers who themselves thing are going to be “saved by white men”.  Because of course BWE is only summed up to white **ck.  (Although I have to believe the only problem with some isn’t the supposed **ck riding, which we all know it isn’t actually occurring , but the fact that it isn’t a black one.) (And there’s also the claim that the writers are simply white MEN. Because black women can’t be dissatisfied without their being a ploy involved amiright?”)

Anyway, after keeping any eye on numerous comments on different sites (btw, loved your post Neecy) and numerous follow up posts I have come finally had time to piece my thoughts together.


I would advise any young black women, and I’m talking 35 and under to simply adopt the stance of #SHOW ME THE MONEY!  Similar #STAYING OUT OF IT, I would advise black women to ask this question before listening to any source.

As has been going on for the past hundred years or so, there are certain “memes” floating around black people that have been pressed in since the dawn of time and, as the new generation of bw struggle with these failing and flailing memes, and begin to question it, are now being force fed it, “The Giver” style.  (For anyone who’s ever read the novel The Giver, you know what I’m talking about)

Sadly, and I say sadly, because I thought I wouldn’t have to talk about this again, the same themes that black women have been told their entire lives. And we all know what they are (just go back to certain blogs and look at the comments), are popping up again.

But since everyone else has already put their $.02 in I’m going to give you a few of my own “truths” because I feel it is disingenuous and misguided to spread falsities.

  • The only time the question of “where will you go” is brought up is  to and by  black people who currently feel that black women are “giving up” “turning their backs” and moving on.  This question is not brought up to black men who date interracially or enter themselves in the global market.  And despite media, I live in a relatively nice neighborhood and HAVE NOT been shot down in the street simply for having brown skin. (Note like most of the neighborhoods I’ve lived in it is multi racial and gasp! I have actually smiled at the other black people)
  • If the black community truly had black women’s best interests at the forethought, or had any plans to do so,  then certain blogs wouldn’t need to be in existence in the first place.  In itself its circular logic that movements like BWE aren’t need simply because if they weren’t black women would be doing a hell of a lot better than they are now.
  • To younger black women:You do not need some “sensei” black women to give you advice on things when you yourself know better. If something feels wrong, if you know that you’re about to get screwed, if you can see from the strewn streamers and deflated balloons that the Dance is OVER  get the hell out of dodge.
  • Never forget that BM have male privilege (and benefit) and white women have white privilege (and use it).  This is not self hate this is reality.
  • Notice that it is not called #Selfhate #delusional #Whatever I am you made me # Selling out when Black men call out white MEN for their assholery. It’s not called # self hate when white women put feminism first.  Because wanting  white privilege doesn’t negate black men’s Male-ness and wanting male privilege doesn’t suddenly deem white women less of a white person.  This is only said to black women by TWO GROUPS both who need black women to STEP ON TO KEEP THEIR PRIVILEGES. Don’t be fooled.
  • I said before that being in the black community would require you to pretend that male privilege didn’t exist and the same for feminists. You are seeing this in action now.
  • Let’s not pretend that there are not nice neighborhoods that bw can live in that don’t include ghettos or involve black women wasting blood sweat and tears to “rebuild” (While wasting their youth)
  • Let’s not pretend that from people (and I mean all Americans) that generally don’t care to give a homeless person FIVE DOLLARS at Christmastime are going to somehow magically rally together and fix the ills of black community that are rooted in misogyny which half the population is benefiting from ((I’ve said the same about feminism.) People are selfish, they are even moreso when they’re privilege is threatened.
  • Let’s not pretend that fleeing “blackistan” means when you see a black person on the street you snub your nose and keep walking. Really that means leaving situations that are dangerous and potentially life threatening. And yes some are more life threatening than others.
  • Let’s not pretend that taking the supposed “easy way” is a bad thing.   I don’t know who, but someone somewhere long ago came up with the delusional idea that “pain” is a virtue, especially for black women.  I aint here for that. It is simply imprudent not to look for maximum results with minimum input. That’s simply good form.
  • Let’s not pretend (if this were only about dating) that BM or any other race are leaving behind  their “blackness” by dating a different race.  Simply because I don’t sit around sing “black black blackity blackity black” doesn’t mean I’m not black, it means that blackness isn’t the SUM and TOTAL of my existence. Further I believe in quality over QUANTITIY.  Having a white spouse, friend,  living in a nice neighborhood or divorcing yourself from FOOLISHNESS doesn’t mean you’re a sellout.

(Sidenote Halima did  post on this very topic of Civil rights activists who talked a good game about bad white power, and where still married to white WOMEN.  If anyone can give me the link, I’ll give a virtual cookie)

Make no mistake there are those that think they’re “above” racist mainstream feminism. And that would be a good thing if these same people hadn’t tried the other half of the same coin. These people think that the black community doesn’t have a population of people who have the same amount of privilege that white women do, albeit for bm it is male privilege.  As I’ve said A MILLION TIMES, that in no case can you divorce either. There is the expectation by some to forget that to be “black” (which is something some obscure face got to define) is at the direct expense of womanhood. (and vice versa)  This had not changed or been addressed.

Interesectionality people!….

The smugness and sanctimonious question of “where will you go” is in fact useless. 1. It operates under the guise that the black men don’t benefit from misogyny in black “communities” you’re going where “everyone know you’re name.”

Unfortunately you’re not Norm from Cheers and this is no different than the black women who have left feminism.

Telling black women to make decisions based on “black” is simply unilateral and misleading, especially when black women won’t benefit from said work in black communities because they’re WOMEN. And we’ve seen this happen time and time again throughout history. Pounding a rock for water is useless, time consuming and tiring.

Further, those who believe that bwe writers are simply around to praise and lavish white peen, are those who have CHOSEN to overlook the years of issues that black women have brought up.

Sidenote: notice how black women doing their own thing is called running to white cock, and yet black Men can be Men and still fight for racial equality.   Quick way to get black women back to the grind. Because black women can’t call out  injustice amiright, and it certainly can’t be directed at anyone who doesn’t have white skin and a penis attached.

Finally as I was saying earlier, I would advise black women to ask the question, Show me the money, Some people have theories that don’t have any proof, profits, or benefits for black women in the long run, further, they’re simply extensions of what black women have been trying and failing at for years.  While some may doubt the effectiveness of new methods proposed by BWE I would suggest you ask SMTM before eradicating these ideas. After all, if the tried and true methods were currently working so well, WHERE IS ALL THE MONEY?

Until Next Time,



13 thoughts on “#SHOW ME THE MONEY!!!

  1. http://dateawhiteguy.blogspot.com/2010/01/whose-zooming-who.html is the post you are looking for.

    As for everything else, those with eyes will see the reality and those with ears will hear the truth. And those who are looking to free themselves will free themselves. What’s going on is the sista soliders and mules seeing that the young BW aren’t signing up for lackluster lives of muling. These women writing these blogs bemoaning BWE are 35+, their youth is pretty much gone and they are stuck in their ways. Women my age group 18-30 aren’t really here for the muling, sista soldering, and sticking up for the BC the same way. There are some but many chucked the deuces at the community in high school. They desperately want to lure these young BW back because their causes will fail without fresh blood.

    Like Khadija said, BWE has been victorious and will continue to be victorious.

  2. An example of one of these men would be Kanye West. I have nothing against him, he inspired my love for music. And I will always appreciate him for that. But I’m tired of seeing those two everywhere. Go away! gosh…I know he’s in love, and seems much calmer/happy. But he can still talk about race and about wanting to be the first black designer to have a classic long-lasting brand like Louis Vuitton etc.
    Lovely post!

  3. That is like being in a burning building and you tell where will you go if you escape. Black women have been lied to for decades and now that tide has turn, let’s hit the panic button. The black women of 18-35 are out in the global society so those lies are not holding water. People don’t take kind to being used and abused and you are exploiting mw with a smile. That is abuse and then you have the nerve to tell me to take it with a smile. Black women have the money, resources and we are not taking it anymore. In safer neighborhoods, black women can walk down the street with out getting harassed. MEN POLICE MEN. Men can’t do that if they are not present. So black women , keeping leaving blackistan and get to safer environments for yourself and your children. That is like what they told slaves on where will you go as if master beating them is such glorious treatment. Black women leave
    and don’t look back.

  4. Lovely post as always. I completely didnt understand the question of where will BW go when they leave Blackistan. Same place other people go. That whole sentiment is rooted in fear, some obvious some subconscious.

    I left Blackistan and I live in a nice relatively (nowhere is 100% safe) safe neighborhood. The notion that leaving Blackistan means you hate yourself and other Black people is evil and is such BS. The tenets of true BWE is not the worship and pursuit of white cock above all else, but self preservation, improvement and happiness. Twisting it around because you still want people to fight the zombies with you is stupid and wont last when folks see the game you running on them.

    BW with sense, young and old, leave you are making the right decision. You come first.

  5. That’s funny.
    “Kerfluffle” is exactly what I called it.

    I took the title to mean compare and contrast the two blogs currently at issue.
    WAOD was a wonderful tool for raising awareness, and scored some victories in letting it be known that there is a growing group of BW who are not going to stand for nonsense.

    Sojourner’s Passport/MuslimBushido raised awareness, provided context, educated on the history/background on many issues facing American Blacks and American black women specifically, inspired many black women to make drastic, positive changes in their lives, and outlined some practical, actionable steps toward that end.

    Umm, there is no contest.

    Gina’s ranting about the firm stance on weight/appearance by the BWE blogs is irrational. Disregarding the powerful impact one’s choice of mate will have on a woman’s life is irrational.
    We can get mad all we want, but well off men overwhelmingly pursue and marry slender women. And despite the shaming tone of the “mancatching” accusations leveled at BWE bloggers, the FACT is that more money can make life go a lot more smoothly.

    As to the “you can be fat and healthy”, yeah, that one’s been disproven too.

  6. Gina is speaking out of fear and jealousy. She no doubt thought about leaving and never felt she could and now sees so many women doing what she herself never could do. When someone is speaking from experience, they tell you the pros and the cons. Here is what I mean:

    I think it was Neecy who wrote a great post about what to expect when you finally decide to expand your dating options, she wrote about overcoming the stereotypes that others may have about you as a bw, she talked about how not every non-bm is open to seeing you as more than a fetish and on and on. I was glad to read the article because a lot of sites make it seem like everything is greener and easier on the other side. It was sort of a ‘what to expect when you leave the black community’ public service announcement. Because she ventured out, she could offer options.

    Gina did not offer the same, which says to me that she has no experience to speak from so she had nothing to offer outside of ‘where will you go?’ I am a lurker of her blog and unfortunately, there are some women young women who are falling for that fear tactic, but as long as the number of sister soldiers continue to shrink, then I am happy.

  7. Great message, but please proof read your posts. I make many typos as well, but the spelling and grammar errors are so obtrusive in this post that many areas I had stop and reread. This coming from someone who is not typically type A personality when it comes to spelling and grammar.

  8. Though I am one of those “middle aged black women.” I always dated who I wanted, white, black, Asian, South Asian, you name it. It’s nice to see young women doing the same. It’s not about selfishness, it’s self preservation. If you don’t take care of yourself, no one else will.

    When people first get sober, they’re told to stay away from slippery people, places and things. You have to tell some people that your “friends” may be invested in you staying sick. So what you do is find new friends, friends who are healthy and who care about your sobriety. Those friends can come in any color, any religion.

    So when they ask, “where will you go?” The answer is that you will go where there are sane, safe people, it’s simple yet so complicated for some.

  9. Pingback: 22 Lies You Tell Your Parents Because You Love Them | ViralTrail.com

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s