Houston… We Have A Problem: Happily Adrift In Our Own Demise… And Other Little Sticky Wickets


It seems that black women have issues, not only do black women have issues but it seems that black women have issues and they don’t even know that they have issues.

Which is the best type of person to victimize….amiright?

Apparently some of the black women that commented on my last article


had numerous problems with the things that I said about black women not supporting media that doesn’t give them good representations. *Ironically that wasn’t really what the post was about in its entirety* but I guess that’s what people deferred payments to.

But after reading the comments, and, phew,  there were a lot,

Here’s what I learned in boating school.

1. Some black women don’t believe that it’s necessary to only focus on supporting black women characters who are in meaningful NORMALIZED relationships (whether the male is white or black).

2. Some black women (and I’m assuming just based on statistics that there are other people who didn’t comment who feel the same way) feel that black women should take all the  roles that they can get to create a hodgepodge of roles that black women  can pick and choose from.

3. Some black women believe that as long as the character is shown being a “well rounded” character, it doesn’t matter if the character is in a relationship. I.e. the character is a ‘strong independent woman’.

4.  Some black women feel that if you don’t support ALL black women, these black women actresses are going to be out of jobs and well….. We can’t have that….

Because there aren’t millions of jobs as, dentists, office workers, psychologists, they could have instead… amiright?

5. Some black women don’t feel it’s a good idea live “vicariously” through television in the hopes of being portrayed as being in a good relationship. * Note: And let’s be clear that these black women are not the ones (like I am)  who advocate turning off ALL media.

6. These black women don’t understand the simplicity of privilege.

7. These black women don’t understand psychology and perception.

And I don’t mean that in a way that would insinuate that I’m insulting any of these readers or commenters  out there. Instead it’s more a reflection on me, because, as they say, it means that I’m not doing my job, eh.

So since my last post clearly left people looking like this:

wrinkled brain

I’ll go back and point out why these basic ideas could potentially spell continued demise for the average black woman.

Let’s begin shall we?

For starters I have said for a very long time (and many commenters also pointed out in their awesome comments) that the mass media is a machine that has its own propaganda going on.   I have, for a very long time, suggested that black women turn off the media all together.

See My Black Women In Fandoms Series under the Series’ Tab.

Unfortunately since the majority of viewers are simply not ready, willing, etc to unplug their televisions and simply walk away their simply stuck playing a game of Russian roulette in which they are only a triggers breath from getting their brains blown out.

You see these women are the ones that don’t understand how privilege works. Or, that is, they aren’t thinking of it in the basic terms.  For women to believe the falsity (and I say falsity because ONLY black women have been sweetly naïve enough to believe this very clever line) that being shown in normative relationships is a BAD THING.

I guess I never made it clear but now I will:  When it comes to black women in most cases concerning feminism the inverse is always going to be true.

That is, and getting purely technical here, whatever will be true for feminists will almost ALWAYS be the exact opposite for black women.

I’ll give you some examples:

1. Many white women feminists have a problem with the fact that many products targeted to white women are always pink, and/ or stereotypically  Feminine. They call for things that are gender neutral.

For black women the inverse is true: Black women ( because of that pesky thing called race) are NOT targeted with things that are “typically feminine” in fact  for black women there is a LACK of feminine clothes, toys etc targeted to black women.

What is the rule here?

White women, because they have white privilege can only complain about these things because they are already ASSUMED to be feminine inherently despite behavior to the contrary.

Here’s another example:

White feminists largely complain that being a stay at home mom is restricting; many feminists believe that the only way to lose their chains would be to have jobs working outside of the home.

For black women the inverse would apply:  Black women (because of that pesky thing called race) didn’t have the privilege of being stay at home moms and deciding to go to work if they felt like it. Since the beginning of black women’s .. ahem.. stay.. here in the Good ole U.S black women have in large numbers, been working, in some form or other.

My family is the perfect example, my grandmother worked, my great grandmother worked (as a maid), her mother worked.  This option was simply not there.

What is the rule here?

White women, because a large number of them had privilege were able to Stay At Home when black women weren’t able to. Now, what does that have to do with this post.  Let’s play the inverse game again. I continually see black women say that as long as the character is “fleshed out” and  has “good characterization” it’s a good role, and that black women don’t have to be shown in relationships (non screwy ones, that is) for it to be positive representation. Because sexism and all that jazz.

The black women have believe this have been hoodwinked to the extreme because they don’t understand what is going on.

But let me break it down for you.

It is not, nor will it ever be beneficial to black women to be *only* shown as “competent workers” and  “strong females”.  Forget your last feminist lesson, forget what your mother told you, forget  the lies that have been peddled and forget who told you them. * We already who spread that lie that black women would benefit even though these same group FLOCK to movies with the exact things they complain about.*

Simply because of black women’s history as workers, the fact that they had to hold down jobs, the presumption that black women are competent if not single, and the pesky little thing called race, black women have NEVER had a problem with being assumed to hold down a job or have a career.

Hell the “Strong independent black woman” idea has become a meme to blacks and non blacks alike in which black women are being laughed at. Like this…

pokemon strong

michonne strong

strong bw

strong no time

toilet strong

strog business

The fact of the matter is troll face got you again. And continues to get you.

I would also venture to say that the only reason why white women can complain about this representation (which they still sign up for mind you and watch on television and) is because they, no matter what they do will inherently be thought of as feminine.

Meanwhile you’re willingly going to the guillotine for them and you’ll never get a penny in recompense.

Black women cannot afford NOT to be represented as feminine. In actuality that fact is what separates black women from white women.

Being shown as feminine, in a relationship, vulnerable, beautiful in mass media would be the way to go to change perception since black women are insistent on playing with the big dogs.

Moving on, let’s talk about the women who may think that it’s in black women’s best interests to support all roles (either bad or otherwise) so they can have an amalgam of ones to choose from.

These women don’t understand the basic tenets of privilege either.

But let me explain why it is deadly to assume that taking on even bad roles will help get black women ‘into the door’

1. It assumes that black women have the privilege of being able to not be characterized by their WORST stereotypes instead of their best. We all know this isn’t true. See memes above.

2.  It assumes that once black women sully themselves making fools and playing the jester for audiences white, black and otherwise, out of the goodness of their hearts will media execs one day decide that black women have paid their dues. It assumes that Hollywood doesn’t have an agenda or a reason to keep black women on the bottom and continue to reinforce that.

3. It relies on other people to give them their “big breaks” which we know isn’t going to happen. See recent comments by Kenan Thompson on SNL and black female comedians who simply “aren’t ready” to be on the show, instead of using the opportunity to stand by other black females.

4.  It assumes that once you’ve overgrown your garden with the weeds that are bad press and bad media  it will be easy to rid, and black women will have the opportunity.  We know this doesn’t happen.   Re. The Tyler Perry effect.

5. It assumes that once you give these people your money they will use it to further a good agenda when all know  that the world loves blacks who behave badly, as long as they will have an audience they will continue to keep being jesters. See Rihanna’s  Pour It Up video in which we all see her practically get a pap smear. Further these people do not want to and never will promote classy blacks, they wouldn’t have been hired otherwise.

Finally one commenter pointed out that beggars can’t be choosers when you’re dying of thirst.

When I first read this I knew there was something faulty about the logic, but I wasn’t sure what it was… I’ve figured it out now, and it might be obvious to other readers.

This comment casts black women in a role in which they are the slaves. In this case black women are dependent on a “master” to “give”( at their whim might I add)  you a trickle of water as they  so choose while ultimately keeping the majority for themselves. Under this idea it is overlooked that the “trickle” black women receive is mostly tainted water that causes dysentery and diarrhea.

Under this idea it also shows that black women can’t get up, walk away and simply move to the GIANT CREEK that is alternative media and work from there. In fact, it makes it seem as if there are chains to be loosed when that is not the case.  In this model of thought, black women have been tricked again in to think that you need  the media, to give you things, ( and not even anything fully) instead of getting up and getting what’s sitting right in front of you.

Again this isn’t the 1960’s the internet is in full force, you are NOT a slave. You are not dependent.

But it does show that the media is doing a good job causing the perception of dependency and ‘all things through us” mentality in black women.

And they say the best type of slave is the one who doesn’t even have to be chained.

This is Stockholm syndrome at its best.   This hopefulness that the media will really , and truly one day give black women something when it had done it’s very best to destroy black women all together.

Further, the supposition that once black women get their foot in the door, they will be given more roles in which are positive is under the assumption that  OTHER groups will support them.

But we know re Kenan Thompson. They will do their very best to keep what privileges they have to themselves.  Because the jackasses, who thought it was alright to degrade themselves for money were let into Hollywood they get to set the standard. These people are easy to appease.  And when they get ahead they will use the only bodies left to stay up. That Is, if it wasn’t very clear, those of black women and girls.

Further let’s not pretend that these groups won’t instinctively revolt against black women taking what they perceived as being their “own” . Ie. Look at the backlash concerning many black women in fandoms.

Basically by supporting anything, you’re supporting the very baseless hope that people will give black women stuff out of the goodness of their hearts after black women have slaved away.

You are playing into a machine and ultimately losing.

Moving on….If I haven’t tired you out already… let’s move to the topic of perception, living vicariously, and the psychology behind the media.

Some readers had a problem with the idea of black women “living vicariously through television”

These black women have a problem with black women going to the media for “relationship representation”

These black women didn’t suggest turning off the television all together, which I would advocate, and have advocated. No. These women were specifically talking about the black women who want to see their own ‘ship’ on television or be cast as love interests.

I’m on to this.

Television is itself  living vicariously. You will never be part of The Avengers. You will never get that hot chick… yes I’m looking at YOU Jonah Hill/ Seth Rogan. You will never be Olivia Pope, or an ad executive in the 60’s or walk with zombies and you will never go on a magic carpet ride.

You will live an ordinary life, on  mid scale, salary, with your mediocre children and your mediocre marriage. Television is an escape. Television is all about living vicariously.

For the people who insist on feeding into the media machine it is also about using said machine to generate positive representation. Because the smart people know that if you see something over and over and over and over and over again you can, whether you admit it or not change perception.

For example see the complete and continual assassination of Asian male characters in the media that we have all seen over and over again that are now part of cultural perception.

Because we all know that if something is said enough it becomes reality whether it’s reality or not.

The only way you would be immune to this is if you unplug completely.

These black women will not but they are busy carrying out the biggest wank by feminists to black women in history.

The wank that I’m talking about is the one where it’s only okay to live vicariously through television as long as it’s supporting the “feminist” (I.e. white female privilege) idea of “not needing a man” (again already assumed for black women) and having a career (also assumed for black women)  The problem these black women raised about living vicariously was ONLY brought up when it came to ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS.

Uh oh.  You see these black women have been tricked by the white feminists who told them that the only thing needed to make black women seen as equal was an awesome career and “independence” (WTM).  So supporting Scandal is alright as long as you only like her because of her bad ass wardrobe. Liking Joss Carter on Person of Interest is simply fine as long as it’s for her mind.. And her mind only.

The greatest irony of it all is that these women don’t realize the inverse on the romantic relationships front.  And that is the ONLY Reason why they aren’t given love lives is BECAUSE THEY ARE BLACK !!!!!  These women so happy with themselves to be given what they perceive as a bone, and so upset that black women want to see themselves on television in relationships don’t realize in the penultimate fail of them all. The only reason why they are not put in relationships is because they don’t want to show black women as flesh and blood characters who think feel, have sex , experience love, and are indeed feminine.

The trick is to make you think that everything’s changed even when you haven’t moved and inch…..

These black women, the evil twin to those begging for their “ship” to win on television when that was NEVER the plan, don’t realize they are simply the counterpart to these women. In fact I’d say that if you think that it’s GOOD to support the roles in which black women are “competent career woman” who don’t “need love lives’ you’re actually even worse off.   Because at least the rabid and delusional “shippers” know what time it is.

They’re simply, how you say, looking for love in all the wrong places, and that’s mass media. For the others, I see the feminist hypocrisy, and I’m calling you out.

For those of you who had no problem with the last post and know you’re getting wanked, I would suggest to continue heading towards the exits, creating your own media, your own representations, and not depending on them or supporting them at all.

Most black women don’t have the resources to throw away on false promises anyway.

You’ll thank me later. Or at the very least save yourself and ass load of money by cutting your cable box, and enjoy a psychological freedom you’ve never experienced before. That is truly when you don’t live vicariously but start representing yourself. Anything is just child’s play.

Until Next Time,

Stay sane, and stay neutral



64 thoughts on “Houston… We Have A Problem: Happily Adrift In Our Own Demise… And Other Little Sticky Wickets

  1. Excellent post and completely on point. Television truly is escapism & I’m ready to cut the cord. Why feed the monster?

  2. I see you are PREACHING tonight. Well we need it. I am a writer and while in college I read some Bell Hooks books, I would suggest some women read the ones about bw and media representation. It helped me to understand representations of black women and how they affect all of us.

    The media affects how people see us, especially men (studies have shown that men are especially sensitive to media representations when picking a partner), but it also affects the way we see ourselves. Don’t read negative things about bw or watch a show that paints bw in a certain, read negative, light for even a few days and see how much better you feel in general and about yourselves.

    OLS, when you said Bw seemed determained to “run with the big dogs” what did you mean?

    I personally don’t think that a large number of bw are ready to get out there, we are used to dysfunction, whether in our lives, the lives of our family, friends, or in our representation in the media. That’s why SOME of us don’t see a problem when we are protrayed as dysfuctional. It seems “realistic” to them.

    I think SOME of us need to get our emotional lives together. I have spent the last year and a
    half doing this, I realized that without doing
    that work, I would have never obtained the life
    the I wanted. I know because of the personal
    work I have done on myself, I will attract and
    expect healthy functional relationships from
    anyone that seeks to be around me. That
    includes the media that I let into my life.

    Because whether bw realize it or not we have definitely been in a abusive relationship with the media.

    • “I think SOME of us need to get our emotional lives together. I have spent the last year and a half doing this, I realized that without doing that work, I would have never obtained the life the I wanted. I know because of the personal work I have done on myself, I will attract and expect healthy functional relationships from anyone that seeks to be around me. That includes the media that I let into my life.”

      Congrats to you!! 😀
      It really does come down to getting our mental health in order. I forgot how Evia phrased it but, she said something in a past post about how emotional AA’s can be and how non-AA’s are very good at using that to control many of. I think this ties into our dependency of mainstream media (and now online tv) and why its so important to walk away while you still have your sanity left. I’m so happy for you that you did the emotional work necessary in order to live the life you wanted 🙂

      • Wow, thank you. It has not been easy, in fact its one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.

        Side note: I really enjoy your blog! Keep up the good work!

  3. Good post. I will admit that I continue to watch TV shows, although fewer than I used to due to the decline in quality.

    I will say that while “Person of Interest” is far from perfect, it has given Joss Carter a love life. Granted, a particular relationship did not end well for a reason that I do not want to spoil, but in the current season there was an episode dedicated almost entirely to around her femininity, going on a date, being kissed, and the male lead being jealous of her being on said date. This season has been highlighting her femininity and vulnerability in addition to having male protection in several episodes…maybe they read your blog. 🙂

    BUT I note what you have said about not having high expectations because they will be dashed. Is it a lull before pulling the rug out? Most likely because I know how TV executives can switch in a flash.

  4. I’ll admit, I am holding out hope on scandal because shonda is a black woman, and she will hopefully do right by us and have Olivia end up in a healthy relationship; but i will say that hope is waning fast given the abusive relationship Olivia has with her dad.

  5. Hi OLS,
    I feel I have to clarify some things to be understood. This is a long response.

    I an not an actress. If I wanted to start out as an actress, I may be forced to take roles I do not like in order to get my foot into the door. I would be drowning and expecting someone to throw me a life jacket regardless of race. If no one knows me, there is competition, and I’m not a great actress then I would have to take what I can to survive. Many actors don’t make it because they don’t get given good roles, ever, or they aren’t very talented, ever. Yes they are SLAVES begging for jobs! But that is the problem of actresses, not my concern, but I understand why they take bad roles. Neither you nor I have any impact on the jobs actresses will choose, they will take bad roles, and those roles will exist whether or not I watch their shows. They chose an insecure career where the majority fail. No point disputing this because I have no expertise in the acting field and I am not an actress choosing to take bad roles. Unless these concerns are directed at actresses, producers, writers etc. then it is just conversation and has little impact on the media.

    Also, because I have no experience with what it takes to produce a show, I do not know how difficult it is and you might not either. People love to talk about Awkward Black Girl, but I didn’t really like the show and could not relate to the lead. She was pretty masculine, listened to misogynist gangsta rap, had unfeminine hair in my opinion, and just didn’t make herself look attractive. Why was she a good role model for BW? Other than Issa Raye, what other BW has done an internet show and gotten recognized for it? How much did the show cost her and the actors? How did she get money to make it? I’ve seen plenty of complaints about other internet shows and plenty of bad actors. Do they make enough money to survive? Or are we encouraging them to invest a lot of time and money into something (Internet entertainment) that is even LESS likely to earn them money, recognition, future jobs, or networking connections, when compared to mainstream media? Is Internet media lucrative? I don’t know the answer but people are acting like it’s a viable alternative for actresses when it may not be. You may enjoy an internet show but if the actors/producers go bankrupt making a crappy show then that isn’t progress. I’m not telling anyone not to do it, but I’m not telling what to do either because I know no knowledge of making shows. Maybe actresses and producers actually KNOW that producing their own stuff is very difficult so that’s why they don’t do it. As a media outsider, I don’t think I have the right to encourage people to get into something I know nothing about and act like it’s the best thing for them. If it was so easy and lucrative then everyone would be doing to.

    I do very little if anything to “support” roles for Black women in the media. When I was blogging I did some posts about shows starring Black women regardless of whether I watched them, regardless of whether those roles were good or not. The posts were to inform BW of BW roles that existed if they were looking for something to watch. It was up to them to decide if they liked the show/characters or not. I don’t tweet, I didn’t start any fan clubs, I didn’t start and letter-writing campaigns. I just watch TV for free on the Internet, commercial free, so my money is not supporting any network or show directly. 99% of the time I watch movies online too so my money is not supporting films either. So as far as giving or removing “support” from a show, that isn’t applicable to me.

    There are BW who think the media is important and want it to change so that it provides a more positive image of BW. THESE BW consumers are constantly writing about wanting to be included and asking for more roles. I think more roles would be nice but I am not asking anyone for anything! I don’t think mainstream media will get much better and I don’t think current Internet shows are great at all. But, to THESE women who have hope and want more roles, my suggestion was to support BW as long as they are attractive and pleasant, regardless of whether they are single. My advice was also to support BW roles as long as they are not obviously negative, stereotypical, and painting BW negatively. From my reasoning, once the media sees that there is general support for BW in many roles then they won’t hold back in hiring them, even for better roles. But I could be wrong. Personally, I don’t think the media pays any attention to what BW want so lending support or withdrawing support won’t make any difference. BW watching a show or not watching it won’t make a difference either because BW viewers are INVISIBLE to the media.

    I also stand by my statement that your viewing habits affect the media only if you have a Neilson rating box. I also stand by my statement that I haven’t seen proof that men seeing attractive/pleasant yet single BW on TV turns them off wanting to date attractive/pleasant single BW in real life. As long as the women are not in negative relationships then I don’t think it makes a difference. It’s not wise to make a big deal about something when you don’t have any proof. If I see proof then I will easily change my mind and say you were right. I don’t believe in big media conspiracies either. I just believe that White people like to see and work with other White people and think White people are the best so their media choices and writing will reflect that. I don’t think they think about BW or what BW want when they make choices.

    • Also, in terms of living vicariously through BW characters what I meant is that BW are feeling personally rejected when they see a BW character single. They think BW character is single = BW character is undesirable/undatable, I’m a BW = I’m undesirable/undatable. BW character gets dumped = I will get dumped. Character chooses WW over BW = Every man will choose a WW over me as a BW. BW is in a relationship = I will have a relationship, BW is loved = I will be loved. This is what I mean by living vicariously. What happens to the character, whether she is a good/bad, single/married, desired/undesired has NOTHING to do with an individual BW viewer. If a BW viewer feels depressed about her own life because a CHARACTER is single, then something is wrong. Your feelings about your own life and worth have to do with your own life, not a character on TV.

      BW have to go out there and get their own lives and stop letting the TV dictate their moods and self-worth. Women like that need to turn off the TV. Seeing relationships on TV is not a bad thing and women are not foolish for wanting to see it, but they need to separate their lives from the characters. Do BW only like vicariously through only BW characters? So when there is a male character they don’t empathize with him? I just don’t get that part about living vicariously in the article. Your life is your life, if anyone is getting so upset over a character it is not normal, it’s fictional and not your real life. I don’t think someone is being bamboozled because they always know TV is not their life and has nothing to do with them.

      • That is television IN ITSELF. that is the the power of media suggestion. Television is aspirational. And media is propoganda. It’s powerful to the suggestive mind (and most people are suggestive whether they admit it or not). Which is why if you notice all of the big networks and even the magazines are only owned by about SIX PEOPLE. People know how powerful suggestion is. Again I don’t see why ( and again you were not the only one) people are suggesting turning off their tv’s completely instead of ONLY not being upset about romantic relationships. I’ve read the studies, i’ve studied psychology, and I know that media affects cultural norms, and mental perception, and influences people whether they want to or not. So chances are people are going tog get upset or affected negatively whether they realize it or not. You simply start taking on thought processes. The point of television is to make you feel you are MISSING SOMETHING so you can buy their product to ‘fix” yourself. (See magazines)

        Again We are essentially saying the same thing except i am pointing out the pseudo concern and hypocrisy of people who point out that women shouldn’t live vicariously through romantic relationships and then don’t say that about everything on television that negatively destroys the mind. These people never say to turn off the tv altogether. These people only come out of the woodwork to talk about black women in romance, and concern troll or push the feminism agenda that you should even WANT To think a character is well rounded if they are married. It’s hypocrisy. And blatantly against what my first post was about to begin with. (which i feel people have taken way off topic) In other words I’m saying that it’s not wrong to want black women to have romantic relationships for characters but theyre looking in the wrong places.

        as for your last paragraph i don’t understand what you’re asking.

    • On the issue of Awkward black girl, I do not really watch the show anymore. My point was in bringing it up is that it is completely possible to create and succeed in making your own media. It is possible to create and succeed and writing your own books. (I’m not even talking about role model material for issa rae because frankly in some ways I agree with you about that.) The show awkward black girl, IIRC was created simply on donations of viewers. She was asking for I think ten thousand and got much more than that. My point is that people do help with start up. There are tons of self produced tv shows, one with another bw that i can’t remember, her name, but she is there. And even for the non black ones there are some that have kickstart funds.( See the Veronica Mars show) You (and I) may not know about creating a show, but there are people who do. Just like I know how to write novels (and do) that have black women characters, and there are people who DO know how to make independent music.

      Acutally, You can make a lot of money through youtube simply by having more viewers, and becoming “partners’ with the show, as much as possible. I don’t see how this is any less of a stretch the HOPING that Hollywood will throw them a bone, at least they would have immediate results. Honestly, I would think you’re getting screwed more when you are trying to be an actress in Hollywood than learning how to produce your own content. Because very few will get hired during the season. you are literally like only a handful of black actress most of which have bad roles. You’re playing with fire. It is actually very possible and easy to create a youtube show and You can make money from them (through ads). Further recently I watched two very independent films that had black women in ir romances in them. One of them seemed very low budget but it was actually pretty good. I’ve also seen other low budget films made by blacks. As many other black women say, the trick is to finding other like minded black women and working with them. I think yo’ve got about as much chance as spending your youth running through Hollywood and hoping they are gong to give you a job. Which for most isn’t likely either.

      To be honest, my advice all together would be to get another CAREER. Because wanting to be an actress (whether white or black) in Hollywood is like spending your life HOPING you will win the lottery. And most of them dont. I do not think that is healthy.

      I wasn’t saying you support things on your blog. I was saying that OTHER black women do. When twisted came out there were tons and tons of black women who did posts on this show spreading the word. When scandal came out there were people doing promotions trhough twitter facebook, tumblr, wordpress (and I saw promootions by black women on all of these platforms) etc. This is MONEY. This is spreading the show by word of mouth, no the nielson ratings may be counted but the cable companies know EXACTLY what you are watching and that data is shared. Companies also know what people are watching through these promotions on personal blogs they can see the google searches and things that are trending. That is why some shows have twitter hash tags to retweet because they know how important it is to have people spread word of mouth. Even people WATCHING the show simply means more people seeing ads and more people BUYING. It’s not as simple as nielsen ratings.

      Black women absolutely don’t realize the gun they have in their hands with social media and promotion. It’s underestimated (which is good for them) but it’s there and it’s important. BLack women have enough power that they DON”T have to promote these shows unless they give them good representation. It’s just like how they tried to create the show on oxygen “all my babies mammas”(about a guy with baby mammas) and the backlash on social platforms was so severe they cancelled it before it premiered.

      Yes black women don’t have much power in the content that is created by the CAN stay NEUTRAL and not do anything to promote at all. they don’t have to reblog, retweet, blog, like, et al. And that is power. Most black women simply don’t see it. Further black Americas are a large portion of spending (YOu’re canadian right? so there are probably less black people) but black americans have large spending power. It depends on what they do or DONT waste their money on.
      Further companies know from cable boxes how many people watch shows. YOu don’t have to watch these shows either. THAT is power. YOu can’t control what is made but you can control what you injest and support. So yes bw watching a show or not does matter. Simply because they KNOW everything about you. For example look at the ads that come on during certain shows these ads are tailored to who the think “you’ are and that is what they play. they have done extensive research. It’s like sometimes when i see a show with black people on the commercials are suddenly “urban”. They are completely studying you whthr you have a nielson box or not.

      Sure, I agree that if the role is positive then why not support it? My point in my original post was that these are few roles and black women should create their own. And instead of getting angry know they name of the game (and that’s NOT giving black women romantic roles) and create your own media to enjoy.

    • Hello Elegance loved your blog btw. It is surely missed.

      I think what happens when we say “well at least the sister’s working” attitude towards Black actresses and the roles they take, we get situations where Blk actreses take roles like that of the infamous Pepsi commercial.

      If all that Hollywood is offering Black actresses at the moment are mammy and strong Black woman roles, maybe more Black actresses should turn away from Hollywood. A 9-5 won’t kill any of them.

      Or they can start their own web series which I can’t imagine being expensive. I think the most expensive thing would be the camera used to film the series.

      Nigeria aka Nollywood has the second or third largest film industry in the world. Could there perhaps be a model which we, Blacks in America could copy? Or perhaps some Black American actresess could try to break into the Nollywood industry?

      Or what about the SouthAfrican movie and television industry?

      We could make our own small budjet str8 to video releases(NOLLYWOOD).

      If the “ghetto book” industry was able to prosper without the help of corporate America as was the small made at home natural hair care bussiness(oyin handmade, BGLH), then so can small Black owned movie companies.

  6. I also started watching Person of Interest and I’m liking it. I don’t want her to date the lead because he’s a criminal and would never be a stable partner or father for her son. She would lose her career and be living with a wanted man. Maybe if it was a White woman they would have paired them but then the woman would have made a bad decision and would really be desperate to go with a wanted man who has killed so many people. I guess some people like that sort of thing. Whether they get together or not I don’t really care.

    • Side note > I hear this alot from some of the viewers who watch the show. Who say Joss is too good to date a criminal. That is exactly what my first post was about. Media PURPOSELY putting black women in roles in which, viewers would instinctively NOT want bw to be with the romantic lead for reasons similar to this, to discourage shipping and in general keep black women in platonic relationships. Similar, as I said in the other post to the people who don’t want olvia with fitz on scandal because of the affair. ( not saying you should either) but that was exactly my point is that they put them bw in characters like this so viewers won’t want to ship. (because again the point of the media is to REAFFIRM black women in non normative roles)

      My point was that blck women need to wise up and stop falling for the hook when it comes to shipping characters because it isn’t going to happen on mainstream tv.

      • It seems like for “Person of Interest” Season 3 the writers thus far are encouraging viewers to ship Carter and Reese or at least planting shipping seeds like how shows normally do, e.g. having him checking out her body, being jealous of her dating, someone asking if they are involved, and someone else asking if he’s her boyfriend.

        On the flip side, your point about their being an established major obstacle works as an out for the writers. The writers could just have started teasing the relationship in order to generate buzz but have no real intention of consummating it. Then, they could play the “It’ll never work between them” card.

  7. Just trying to learn about the media here because some of these things I don’t think are true but I will search to find out if they are. If they are true then I will change my viewing habits, but if not then there is no need to:

    “This is spreading the show by word of mouth, no the nielson ratings may be counted but the cable companies know EXACTLY what you are watching and that data is shared. ”
    “Further companies know from cable boxes how many people watch shows.”

    If these things are true then I would agree with you but to my knowledge cable companies do not collect data on who is watching what and they don’t sell that data. Otherwise what would be the point of Nielson ratings? I will have to look into this. Everything I have ever heard says that ratings are based on Nielson not cable companies. Cable companies may know when your cable is being used but not what channel the cable is on.

    Personally I would never suggest my future kids or anyone go into a field based on the way they look, physical ability, or so fickle and insecure as the arts. Some people hate that but the term “starving artist” exists for a reason. If all BW quit show business it might be good for those artists, but other BW would miss their presence, beg for more presence, and other BW would step in to take their place. People crave fame and some are desperate for money and will do anything to get on TV (e.g., reality TV). BW need jobs that are more secure.

    “Acutally, You can make a lot of money through youtube simply by having more viewers, and becoming “partners’ with the show, as much as possible. I don’t see how this is any less of a stretch the HOPING that Hollywood will throw them a bone, at least they would have immediate results.”

    See this here I can’t agree. I’m a very cautious person and you seem to have a lot of hope in an unproven Internet media industry. I can look at Hollywood and name Black people who have become successful and rich from Hollywood but I can’t name a BLACK person who became successful and rich from YouTube. The salaries and worth of a lot of celebrities are posted (e,g., Forbes), but I haven’t seen anything similar for YouTube stars. Some may be very popular, but if they are making less than $30,000 a year then that’s not very successful in my opinion. We don’t know what they earn. We don’t know if they are doing YT part-time and working full time at something completely different or in Hollywood because YT doesn’t pay enough. I’m unfamiliar with YT stars so maybe some get 15 minutes of fame, but do they actually have careers?

    I don’t think begging successful and established Hollywood producers for work is riskier than begging strangers to donate money to help with your show. Hollywood producers have track records and can point to projects they have worked on, YT producers don’t have that. What if you don’t get enough money? What if they think your show is crap and people don’t want to donate? Plus, you also said we should not support shows until we know that they will present BW in a good light, but we won’t know that with YT shows either. We could end up directly paying for shows that make us look bad. That would be the case had I paid to put Awkward Black Girl on the air because I don’t think she makes BW look appealing at all. I’ll have to look into the success of YT stars but I don’t think they are successful. You are HOPING that this is going to be a great and lucrative alternative but it might not be. There are a lot of low budget things produced in Nigeria, but they don’t look very good, and I don’t think they always paint BW in a good light either. Lack of money, acting skills, and good writing shows in the Nigerian films. I don’t think it’s that easy. I will read some articles about YT stars and making media if I have spare time but really, since I’m not in the industry and don’t plan on making TV it won’t make a difference. I can’t think of many successful Black writers either.

    I don’t know, interesting topic but it’s not like my opinion will have an effect on the industry or individual women’s choices. Happy Friday though 🙂

    • If these things are true then I would agree with you but to my knowledge cable companies do not collect data on who is watching what and they don’t sell that data. Otherwise what would be the point of Nielson ratings? I will have to look into this. Everything I have ever heard says that ratings are based on Nielson not cable companies. Cable companies may know when your cable is being used but not what channel the cable is on.

      if you want i can do research and and do an article on the topic? I’m sure other readers might be interested.

      In some of the cases in youtube like ABG she asked for money for the second season and sometimes in the kickstarter funds they give a rundown about what their project is about.

      Happy Friday~!

      • Hi OLS,

        Sure if you want to, no pressure though.

        So people who liked the first season of ABG may have supported her for the second. But she wouldn’t have needed donations if the first season made enough money. What if someone doesn’t have money for even the first season and people don’t want to invest in what they don’t know. Since I didn’t like the show I would not have paid to keep it going. There are a lot of Black bloggers but some are actually using YT for evil and probably making money off it like Tommy Bastard Sotomayor who’s whole channel is devoted to bashing BW. In my opinion there is more BW hate on YT than there is on cable. Google “Black women” on YT and all you see is hate. I can’t even use that term to find BW vloggers anymore so I may be missing out on a lot of them.

    • Elegance I can speak on web series on Youtube much but I can tell you the Black hair and makeup gurus who have thousands of viewers are Making living if not a well paid side husstle.A few of them are sponsored by major companies. Others are paid to host parties and natural hair events. A few have their own haircare lines. Most have allow commercials before there vids.

      There was/is one waist length natural hair guru ,whose name escapes me right now, who according to the NYT made enough money that she left her job consulting.

      Maybe most of these sis

    • “See this here I can’t agree. I’m a very cautious person…What if you don’t get enough money? What if they think your show is crap and people don’t want to donate?”

      It’s not bad to be cautious, really, because it’s risky. But risky ideas can be followed with accurate risk assessments. It’s unwise to run into any industry blindly, but there are already established content producers in every genre that can serve as exemplars. And so the question at that point is what does it exactly take to produce your own media?

      A film company is a business, and a piece of media is a product, and just like other businesses and products, there should be a solid business and marketing plan before money is spent. Even with that knowledge, it’s not smart to go out and do a production that costs more that the business can afford in filmmaking or anything else. But a lot of beginning content producers start small, and they use income from one source to fund their later projects. Or they start safe then go ambitious.

      There’s no guarantee that a work of art will achieve critical or commercial success. But there is information out there for the aspiring creative type on how to hone their craft and achieve their vision without losing their financial stability.

      I wonder sometimes if we’re so often taught that creative enterprises are risky because that allows us to be less participatory in media creation. We don’t see ourselves and we get the sense that it’s not safe for us. We get taught to focus on articulating the risks, but not to find strategies to mitigate them. I often feel as if that’s another aspect to the marginalization of Blacks in White-centered media.

  8. Here are the 25 highest earning YT stars http://www.celebritynetworth.com/articles/celebrity/the-25-highest-earning-youtube-stars/ Wow some of these channels are making millions, but other than College Humor and Jenna Marbles, I haven’t heard of any of them. I don’t know if these are just people talking or what (Jenna just talks). Issa Rae is not up there. They seem to be mostly men and a lot of gamers. Maybe one could make a living but they have to have the talent and probably the looks. There seem to be comedy skits not shows.

    And this one http://thenanobyte.com/2013/05/the-richest-youtube-stars/ “More people watch YouTube than every other broadcasting company combined. YouTube has destroyed TV…And from this program, stars were born. In fact, most of the top YouTube stars have literally made millions of dollars from it. They have the dream job, and they know it: create fun videos that they originally started as a hobby and get paid to do it. Unfortunately, a contract with YouTube forbids any of them from actually revealing their pay, but you can make some relatively accurate guesses based on the subscriber and view count of the channel. ”

    Wow ok! I haven’t seen a scripted show up there or any Black folks, unless I missed it. The shows would have to be low budget to make a profit though. I wonder how much the popular hair bloggers and make-up bloggers earn now. It could be a lucrative hobby. So you may be right about the Internet angle. I had no idea anyone was making so much money. I use Adblock so I’m not even seeing YT ads anymore. This is blowing my mind a bit because if you have a niche topic you could make a lot of money…

    From what I’m reading online Cable companies only know the pay-per-view PPV things you order not what shows and channels your are watching. The technology is available to do that though but it just isn’t happening yet. So you watching something on cable has no impact on TV ratings unless you have a Neilson box. Clicks can be recorded for the things I watch online but the same ads seem to appear for every show, not based on popularity. I don’t think they are selling that data. I know for sure that there are Twitter Neilson ratings. But as for other internet traffic, those thing are very inaccurate and can be faked easily. There are PR people who tweet and are paid to write things. Some shows also have fans that LOVE a show and write about it a lot, but it still gets cancelled due to low Nielson ratings. Ratings trump internet traffic. Even if you and I never talk about what we watch, TV still advertises and shows were watched even before people talked about it over the internet.

    • Wow ok! I haven’t seen a scripted show up there or any Black folks, unless I missed it. The shows would have to be low budget to make a profit though. I wonder how much the popular hair bloggers and make-up bloggers earn now. It could be a lucrative hobby. So you may be right about the Internet angle. I had no idea anyone was making so much money. I use Adblock so I’m not even seeing YT ads anymore. This is blowing my mind a bit because if you have a niche topic you could make a lot of money…

      Lol, yes, you can make money on niches, not even on youtube either there are so many black women ir novelists who are making a lot of money because it’s a niche! Or the woman who wrote fifty shades of gray started with self publishing! ( Not that that would be your thing but it does show if you have a niche it works. Like Amanda Hocking (iirc) you can do this by yourself and be in control.

      They are trying to put on new tvs cameras on them to monitor who is in a room, to tailor ads to people for example if you have a dog, in the room they want to tailor ads about dogfood. That was a problem on the new x box that people were having a problem with


      The companies do know and track what trends on twitter and other media sources though.

      I’ll try and do an article on it when I have time. I think this is an important topic because if black women are self suffient it ultimately means that they can stay neutral and not be pulled in to things.

      • this is such a stupid argument because bw on YT like Patricia Bright, Gabe&BabeTV, BeautybyJJ, Whitney&Felipe, Africanexport and COUNTLESS others have made thousands if not hundreds of thousands of dollars off of YT and deals they now have. Many have quit working their regular 9-5 job to pursue the type of career they really want or have increased their current business through YT.


        that would NOT have been possible in Hollywood. at this point, they don’t need to make millions to be successful. By bw like myself tuning in to their videos every week, WE have given them these opportunities and helped make them successful. Do you know as we speak new film studios are being created because of YT? (an ir couple on YT wm/bw, the husband works for a production company) Hollywood is not the end all be all to getting exposure and being successful when it comes to media.

        I’m really over these lame excuses.

    • Neilson has published a report that states that ratings are influenced by online activity. This can be found on their website.

      ““Using time series analysis, we saw a statistically significant causal influence indicating that a spike in TV ratings can increase the volume of Tweets, and, conversely, a spike in Tweets can increase tune-in,” said Paul Donato, Chief Research Officer, Nielsen. “This rigorous, research-based approach provides our clients and the media industry as a whole with a better understanding of the interplay between Twitter and broadcast TV viewing.”

  9. sorry for the rambling/misspellings (im typing this from my phone)

    “For those of you who had no problem with the last post and know you’re getting wanked, I would suggest to continue heading towards the exits, creating your own media, your own representations, and not depending on them or supporting them at all.”

    I would also include stop having “discussions” with other bw and bm who pretend to be obtuse about what’s going on which is what is happening in the comment sections these past few posts.

    The fact is black women’s spending power in this country alone is at least $$1 Billion. There are companies and researchers being paid BIG BUCKS to specifically track down all of bw spending habits, just as they do with every other demographic in the country. WE MATTER, period. so when we don’t support something, financially, physically, or emotionally, IT WILL BE NOTICED. maybe some of you haven’t been paying attention to how BWE has spread. bw’s leeches sure have which is why they have been stepping up their game.

    I was watching Scandal yesterday and…Idk it all just clicked lol. I really don’t have anymore excuses for why I continue to support shows like that. its a show based off a bw, created by a bw, STARRING a bw and YET……UGH. we are 3 seasons in and the dysfunction is not going away anytime soon. Shonda has the power to do so yet…..I’m beginning to think she has a lot more in common w/ Oprah & Tyler Perry than I thought. The only difference is O&TP use loud, obese, neck-rolling caricatures to spread their pain porn, where here, Shonda uses a pretty, thin, beautifully dress bw to peddle her nonsense. different packaging, same sh^%. I’m really annoyed with myself that I fell for more of the okey dokey : /

    I think bw reaaaaallllly need to put to rest this really stupid idea that if we show Hollywood our support for a show or for a relationship involving a bw through viewership and tweets, they’ll agree to our demands to have more bw on the tube and the big screen. its ignores the point you made OLS that their main goal is NOT to be inclusive. they will always be WW worship only. now they may expand to include obese ww comedians like Suki (i forgot her real name), but overweight and obese bw need not apply, unless they are othering you like they did Gabby S. w/ that horrible magazine cover.

    there is no better example of this NOT HAPPENING EVER than bw’s loyalty to soap operas. How many damn times have there been these ir relationships with the bw where bw end up on top…..permanently, like more than 1-2 episodes???? And yet bw have been supporting this industry for DECADES. It’s no wonder they don’t take bw’s complaints seriously. what group is notorious for publicly complaining THEN continues supporting it anyways??? everyone knows we do this.

    I think Elegance hd some great content on her site when she was blogging, but regarding this issue, all I see is the same ol’ defeatist and hopelessness tone that comes out whenever the BWE bloggers suggest alternative strategies that involve bw having to WORK MENTALLY & EMOTIONALLY. bw will bust their butts supporting people that don’t reciprocate by taking extra shift or extra jobs to help other people out, but for some reason, when it comes to doing heavy lifting MENTALLY, for their own good….that’s when the excuses start. admit it, the thought of really investing in ourselves and becoming the person we really want to be is terrifying and its EASIER EMOTIONALLY to live vicariously through tv characters. Every group has people who do this which is why media conglomerates make billions every year, but can groups like bw AFFORD to do this much longer??

    That’s the message I’ve been getting out of your recent posts OLS 🙂

    • What do you want? Do you want me to mindlessly just believe and follow whatever any blogger or BWE blogger says without thinking about it and researching it for myself? Like BW mindlessly followed whatever BM and feminists say? I discuss and think about things. Maybe you have already discussed or thought about these things already, good for you, but initially a lot of the things said on and on BWE sound like paranoid, conspiracy theory diatribes from people from a foreign country. Everything said on these blogs is not automatically correct, wise, or applicable to everyone. It takes time to understand views that are vastly different from your own.

      Youtube does not publish how much Black bloggers earn so how would I or anyone else know they are making a living off it? Youtube content is also different from the TV I usually consume which is sci-fi, horror, cop dramas, medical dramas, and legal dramas. Most of these things can not be produced to my liking on a small YT budget so YT will never be enough for me. It’s good for social commentary, comedies, and instructional videos. Actresses and writers can and will do whatever they want. My commentary here and (no offense) this blog will not change that. If you don’t like the comments don’t read them, you are not compelled to read them.

    • “I was watching Scandal yesterday and…Idk it all just clicked lol. I really don’t have anymore excuses for why I continue to support shows like that. its a show based off a bw, created by a bw, STARRING a bw and YET……UGH. we are 3 seasons in and the dysfunction is not going away anytime soon. Shonda has the power to do so yet…..I’m beginning to think she has a lot more in common w/ Oprah & Tyler Perry than I thought.”

      AMEN!!!!! This is why I stopped watching Scandal in the middle of season two.

  10. It would be very helpful if someone would list some good shows and channels on YT because in the first two pages of searching “Black women” the majority are hate videos, why BW are single, a couple of hair videos, and a couple on sexy BW, no scripted shows. Not interested in reality TV type shows just following people around.

    • Unwritten rules, awkward black girl, venus vs mars, brothers with no game
      There are other i’m sure, but off the top of my head. There are plenty other channels, i can’t think of em just now.

  11. Great post especially because it’s facilitating discussion.
    I believe that some of us black women (bw) either do not understand how the media works or we understand (more or less ) how the media works and ‘go along’.
    ‘How the media works’ refers not so much to the technical but the nuanced or social impact. The subliminal messaging, psychological impact and cultural exportation. Mainstream media like advertising, packages and sells a message/product/service. However, it’s more insidious with mainstream media because while with advertising we know we’re being pitched products or services with mainstream media – movies, tv series – we’re sold a (sometimes subtle, most times overt) message about white supremacy and the establishment is only interested in perpetuating it’s dominant position and there’s no room for bw. It’s a difficult concept to accept and that stage of denial/non-acceptance hinders critical thinking/analysis & development of adequate strategies.
    About that hollywood message – no, those ideal/three dimensional roles for bw in hollywood are not happening (no matter how many crumbs they drop) – they’re not able & willing to make bw top of the food chain on our terms! We need to accept this and move on.
    Speaking of the power of hollywood messaging, I travelled to South East Asia this year and interacted with various people. Many prejudged me based on movie, rap/hip hop and media stereotypes of bw and I had to correct a number of assumptions. I work in an industry with an international element and quite a number of people I often interact with are people who know nothing or very little about bw and whose source of knowledge is hollywood/mainstream media. As a result, I do not have the luxury of watching materials from hollywood/mainstream media and their subconcious targetted messaging when I know that I need my wits about me and awareness in being and presenting myself as a three dimensional and functional bw.

    One of the commentors referred to ‘Nollywood’ – Nigeria’s film industry. Granted some of the points about writing/plots and representation of bw are valid but I noticed that a number of West African/Nigerian women have developed their own production companies or are raising funds and developing their own stories with improved representations of women and better story concepts and plots. Unfortunately, I do not have names of the women I’ve referred to on hand but when I collect them I’ll add them. I also think that some Nigerian films narrate stories in which women as lead characters are represented as functional women that are relatable – smart, working, sexy, wives, girlfriends, sisters, mothers, loved, supported and cherished with the mandatory conflicts and drama that is requisite of a good/great storyline.
    What encourages me about these women in the Nigerian industry is that they understand and accept that hollywood won’t accept or represent them, they understand and accept that Nigerian men can’t tell their stories (appropriately) and so they’re doing it for themselves. I’d rather research these women and the movies they make and if I’m satisfied, watch those movies. Similarly, I shut out rap/hip hop and prefer to research and listen to black female jazz and blues artists.
    I’m also choosing to turn off the tv and engage in hobbies that develop life skills.

    There are materials and resources available if we are willing to research and analyse them critically or we should develop our own.

    • “It’s a difficult concept to accept and that stage of denial/non-acceptance hinders critical thinking/analysis & development of adequate strategies.”

      great points Narr. I also agree about Nollywood. They may not be the best at their craft, but they aren’t a) sitting around and begging for roles, b) whining like a lot of black actresses about how Hollywood isn’t fair to bw, c) they are writing, directing, and producing their own films.

      I would love to see more collaborations between African women and black American women when it come to film production and film distribution…..similar to the alliances Danai Gurira has going for herself 🙂
      Nollywood proves that IT IS POSSIBLE to have an industry dedicated to black faces telling their stories. Like I said earlier, I have very little patience for bw you make excuses and are just plain LAZY intellectually. American media has clearly stunted some bw’s mental growth and they don’t even realize it, or they realize it and don’t care…..

      • She’s the Difference Maker — We’re all out of excuses and ‘not caring’ is not a viable option.

        l looked up Danai Gurira’s work -Mother of George-as I did not know she was involved in such projects. Is it the one you were referring to? If it is, savvy move on her part – widening her networks and exploring roles outside hollywood’s narrative of bw.

        Collaboration in film production and distribution between black American and African women is a great idea! I’m watching for that.

    • My name did not type fully in my last comment.
      Wanted to say, this comment is everything, as a Nigerian girl i can tell you that i agree. I have watched my fair share of naija films, and whilst it tends to be over dramatic in parts, i can say, most of the time, it has a variety overall in terms of facets of a character etc. not sure i make sense. There are still ways to go, but, agree wholly on developing own.

  12. The honest true, is these women do not give a damn. They want to be entertain and the more you call them on their crap, they will used any excuse to support this bad behavior. I have a mother and sister who support twisted Tyler Perry and that buffoon Steve Harvey. Black women can write and produce their own films. Prime example “Dido” which is a true story about Dido Belle Lindsey. This film is being written, produce and directed by a black woman, I cannot remember her name right now, but she not making excuses for herself. Thank you.

  13. Hey!!! Noting for the show Scandal – even if Olivia and the president end up together. It most likely won’t be until the end of the series when the show will be over. So again we don’t get to see black women in a normal or happy relationship with other men. But that’s exactly why black women should simply create their own shows and films where they answer to no one, and stop begging other people – white media – for scraps.

  14. To the blogger ‘Narr’ —- You are on point! Black women can’t afford to support any and all depictions of black women on tv and film. Because other racist and ignorant people, including people who have never been around black women will look at the few negative stereotypes that whites have given black women in the media, and will apply those negative stereotypes to ALL black women. I don’t know why some black women are being ignorant about this. As the blogger ‘Tina’ said, black women can easily create their own shows and films like tyler perry – (who is bad for black womens’ image) instead of begging other races of people when they can easily do for self!!!!!!

    • Tina — “… Because other racist and ignorant people, including people who have never been around black women will look at the few negative stereotypes that whites have given black women in the media, and will apply those negative stereotypes to ALL black women.”
      True. I could tell you a number of stories (my experiences) about this!

      “As the blogger ‘Tina’ said, black women can easily create their own shows and films like tyler perry – (who is bad for black womens’ image) instead of begging other races”

      Yes we can write, act, produce, direct and distribute our own stories. However, it’s not easy and we stumble, procrastinate or never start because we’re not prepared (especially mentally) for the task at hand. OLS’s blog and articles are great (especially for me) because she thinks about and writes about issues relevant to bw that we know but aren’t always willing to articulate or issues we shy away from.

  15. Well said queen. I was begining to think I was the only Black woman who does not watch Scandal.

    I saw part of an episode where the prez had ruff sex with Olivia. I was immediately turned off. Had the two been dressed differently, it could have well been a rape seen for a movie about slavery.

    I have no desire to see a Black woman have ruff sex on my TV screen esp ruff IR sex. Black women deserve to be treated liked fine china and have their bodies worshipped during TV & movies sex scenes just as White women. We are not men or a male- female hybrid.

    • NO YOURE NOT…. i dont like the show either…i wish they would show a nice interracial couple on a show somewhere actually without using a homosexual marriage couple alongside them. It is also a reason i use the handle ZIPPORAH whom was Moses’s wife (Numbers 12:1 KJV) i just notice, they link them together. When i saw Olivia with the other guy, he had her across a dresser trying to ….and it as enough for me to not watch it, besides they are breaking the 7th commamdment!!

    • Whenever someone brings up slavery in a Scandal discussion I always want to give them my library card.

      To give you a glimpse into what those women had to endure, one story was of a GIRL who used to be stripped, made to get on all 4s and whipped till she foamed at the mouth.

      So NO, having your clothes torn off in a frenzy doesn’t equate to being RAPED, often while pregnant.

    • For the life of me I don’t understand why those of you who don’t like Scandal can’t see how offensive/insulting and may I add uneducated the slavery references are? There isn’t an episode on Scandal that could EVER come close to the horrors of slavery. I have watched every episode of Scandal and for the life of me I can’t remember one episode that even came close to ‘rough sex’. Frenzied sex, yes, rough, no.

      To give you just a glance into what our ancestors had to go through, one young girl…..GIRL. used to be stripped naked in front of her master, made to kneel on all fours and whipped till ***she foamed at the mouth***, THAT is what those women had to go through, whether pregnant, young, old, sick or healthy, they had absolutely no say in how their bodies were USED and ABUSED. So dislike Scandal, hell, hate it if you want, but don’t bring slavery into the mix.

      • pardon the double post, please feel free to delete one if you like, I don’t know why the other one did not appear when I checked the site.

  16. Hi, I agree with ur post. I’m watching season 2 scandal ep. 13 & after. If Fitz was a girl, we d already have ditched her as a friend -too much diva attitude. Last time I checked, he was born with silver spoon. Olivia has worked hard to get where she is & I want her to appreciate it. She won’t- therefore I’m back to watching Eureka (real IR love with jack & Allison)

  17. Can’t wait to see the film Belle which was produced by a black woman.

    And can’t wait to see the #TLC film on VH1 Oct 21. Another black women success story. Although I don’t think the actresses chosen to play them were right for the film, I will still watch. Even though TLC and Toni Braxton who were both signed to the same record label were robbed of money by their own people from their record label. Since their creation, black record companies have always tried to screw black women over financially – like EnVogue etc.

  18. Hi OLS,
    I found your blog reading some posts on BlackFemaleCulture. I read all of your posting in two days! Staying Neutral has become my new motto!
    I have purposely been seeking out blogs that onlu uplift BW, I cleaned out my IPOD abd replaced it with positive music and I am very careful about exposing myself to negative
    propaganda. The result….I feel like a mental load has been lifted, my perspective has been
    sharpened because when I do encounter it, I see it for what it is.
    Media is a powerful tool that has been/continues to be used to subjugate BW in particular. Why would they change the way they represent BW now? They won’t.
    Who really believes that mainstream media wants to portray BW as feminine, desirable, atrractive women? That would mean we might be considered viable mates and therefore competition. Its the reason that BW are often hardest hit with the “scientific studies” of how unattractive we are, which is the biggest lie on Planet Earth.
    I know it must be frusttating sometimes that some BW just don’t seem to get what is so obvious, but anytime you are advocating for a shift against the status quo, resistance, sometimes mainly from the group you’re trying to esteem, is expected.
    Western Blacks hold the highest level of wealth in the world. If the Nigerian women can unify and positively promote themselves, Black American women have no excuses.
    We control the wealth, resources and education in our community on a large scale. Our potential in all sectors of society are limitless.
    I’m not sure that most BW are going to understand just how harmful our representation has been, until they can consistently SEE counter programming.
    Time is waiting for no one and the time to make the push is now, which is exactly what the women in my immediate family are now doing, online and on the ground amongst other like minded BW.
    I hope you’re fully aware that you have many other readers like me who are answering the call. Keep up the good work and looking forward to your next post.
    All the best to you!

    • AMEN in staying neutral…its the only way to rescue the black womans image..i NEVER liked rap. Yes i’ve listened to rappers delight when it came out in 1978–borrowed off of a DISCO RECORD BY CHIC singing GOOD TIMES…not the show. I’ve always wondered where the music as going to go after disco..right in the sewer, and it actually destroyed MOTOWN IMO–not all at once but took time. By the late 80s, the music business was kinda finished the ‘top 40s especially’. i still love BILLY OCEANS CARRIBEAN QUEEN that came out in 1984..i love romantic songs, especially with girls names in them..Rosanna by Koko was either one of the last ones, or the last one. Many lovesongs sound weird with these modern unisex names in them that people name their daughters

  19. Yes, television is escapism and IT ALWAYS WAS. I was just remembering, the show called THE JEFFERSONS and the interracial couple on the show, the Willisses, Tom and Helen; that was one role where the black woman was able to be a SAHM and on clubs, with Louise, etc.
    They were introduced on ALL IN THE FAMILY when Lionel wanted to introduce his parents to her parents; and Archie was talking to Tom Willis, not knowing he had a black daughter. Tom and Helen were played by different people—and they were amazingly NORMAL with Tom with his arm around his wifes shoulder–when the show THE JEFFERSONS came out, they used Franklin Cover and Roxie Roker (Lenny Kravitzes mom) to play them. Unfortunantly they made Tom a little fat and nerdy, but Helen was still a lady. The Jefferesons even went into the animosity of the two grandfathers whom Jenny wanted to get together, and her white looking brother and his hangups of not fitting in ‘Alan’. This was JUST BEFORE c/RAP music took over with the song RAPPERS DELIGHT by the SUGAR HILL GANG.
    Later ive heard the sugar hill gang was financed by an older white woman…and even the song wasnt treating black woman from the start

    • ..also, unfortuantly in todays terms, Roxie Roker would be too dark for the c/rapper crowds..(sigh)..since the RAPPERS DELIGHT song, spoke about taking his girlfriend to a hotel, and if she started to act up and didnt want to go (say what) you take her friend…RAP MUSIC WAS NEVER ANY GOOD— unless you could turn it into a form of preaching==WHEN people no matter who, try to hurt black womans image, especially the images of the black lady (Helen Willis) they eventually hurt their own. There are few images of romance today..unless the woman was desperate..no more Cinderella-like stories..
      oh yes, i’m one woman who also stays neutral when it comes to faminism and civil rights–the most irritating verse in the last 40 years is WOMAN AND MINORITIES…..I’M MARRIED and have been for 24 years to a non black man, who has married white woman before so his daughters look white, so im not talking about all whites exploiting, just the liberal elite.. the conservative ones arent as racist as they make it sound

  20. New here.

    Excellent article and approach to Black women and media representation.

    All the comments here reflect pretty much my views on the media anyway. Not a whole lot more to add.

    Solid thoughts from all the comments.

  21. EXCELLENT post! I read the last entry “A is for Anger” and was not able to comment. What you have said here, parallels what I have been saying about why BW need to do it up, outfit and make up on POINT when they are off to work. WW have the privilege of being able to dress down, because their femininity and intelligence is immediately assumed. BW on the other hand are immediately assumed to be not as intelligent, classy, ladylike or even as female, as the WW seated next to her and we need ALWAYS to be … on POINT!
    The media has done a great job of perpetrating the idea that BW are too strong and too good and too intelligent to be in a relationship with a man with a flaw (e.g. a criminal, unemployed, vampire, etc) but that same man / character is the romanticized into: “a bad boy” when it is a WW involved. It sounds like flattery and a high estimating, except the end result is always the same: the BW is left alone and lonely, while the WW is tightly holding on to the man. I am and have been for some time now, unplugged from TV, so I haven’t watched a lot of the shows that you mention and so obviously, I agree with you that BW need to find some other source of entertainment and/or education. The mainstream media has made its choice, we do NOT have to live with it, we have alternatives.
    Speaking of alternatives, I have to mention something. The idea of success being measured by the amount of money you make off a project is one that is falsely limiting. Success equaling cash and gold is an idea that is barely working for people with privilege and it is one that BW (with our limited or nonexistent privilege) need to turn away from. Success is measured in control and power. Control over your image and power in influencing how that image of yours is perceived and used. You can make money doing almost anything, but being able to maintain control and have influence in ANY situation, is the true measure of how successful you have been in that area. If you doubt me, check with Ms. O. She has money, but the REAL thing that made her successful is the power and influence that she wielded over the millions of women that followed her blindly and faithfully. Success for BW at this level is being able to control and influence OUR image and perception. It is OUR Image. OUR’s! Once we can control and maintain how it is used and perceived, the additional success of milk and honey will begin to flow, a bit more seamlessly.
    One more bone to pick with you, OLS. So, you say it’s “NEVER” on the riding a magic carpet thing? Can I at least get a “maybe”? or something? Geez!

    • have to mention something. The idea of success being measured by the amount of money you make off a project is one that is falsely limiting. Success equaling cash and gold is an idea that is barely working for people with privilege and it is one that BW (with our limited or nonexistent privilege) need to turn away from. Success is measured in control and power. Control over your image and power in influencing how that image of yours is perceived and used. You can make money doing almost anything, but being able to maintain control and have influence in ANY situation, is the true measure of how successful you have been in that area

      Excellent Point!!!!! I’m glad you pointed this out!

      One more bone to pick with you, OLS. So, you say it’s “NEVER” on the riding a magic carpet thing? Can I at least get a “maybe”? or something? Geez!

      Lol, I’m sorry, I’ll leave it as a maybe.

  22. Pingback: Asdfghjkl?……..O_o? …… Derp? | NotYourGirlFriday

  23. Pingback: Black Women in Fandoms 106: The Trick Is To Make You Think We’re In This Together, When Really They’re Dancing On Your Bloodied Corpse | Not Your Girl Friday

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