Ah Benevolance! : The Trick Is to Make You Think It’s For Your Own Good When Really You Wind Up As Empty Handed As Before- BWiF 103

I’ve written before that the biggest way to trick black women and get them to support anything was to make them believe that it is somehow benefiting them.

Indeed this is true. When I look at black women who continually support things that have given them no proof that it will ever come back to them I always notice that the independent variable in all of this, is that these women truly and utterly believe, have truly been indoctrinated by very clever foxes, that they are going to benefit.

This is especially true when I look at black women who support the media in all of its f-ery. Whenever the masses of black women realize they’ve been screwed the ultimate response is ‘calm down, I’m doing this for you. You’ll come out on top in the end.”

That is, when black women try and escape the mental hospital that they’ve been involuntarily placed in, they’re immediately subdued by Nurse Ratched, with medications and a strait jacket.

For the ones that really put up a fight they’re lobotomized, old school style, until their mind is a vegetable and they can’t tell which way from the other.

Case in point, apparently some fans of the show tweeted Julie Plec ( the show runner/writer  for the vampire diaries ) a while back about the character to Bonnie being with one of the vampires.

*I should note that I do not watch the show The vampire Diaries, (though I have seen clips of the show) but as a blogger  for black women I make it my business to know what is going on in the world of black women so, I follow many things.

Anywhoo, apparently some fans tweeted Ms. Plec about putting Bonnie with the character (Kol?) or any character romantically.

And this is her, Julie Plec’s response.   I took the liberty (thanks to an Oh NO You Didn’t Article On the matter) posting the entire pic of the twitter exchange below

You see my darlings, this is a classic case of  Nurse Ratched realizing that the patient that she’s been secretly controlling is now getting unruly and temperamental. The black women who she’s been keeping  on a leash for the past four? Years  are suddenly wondering why the character that is supposed to look like them  is single and alone and ( as the fans have described) for all intents and purposes the slave to the other characters on that only use her.

Her response is typical, why up the dosage!

She quickly begins this by of course showing how benevolent she is. Why she’s doing black women everywhere a favor by not giving Bonnie a storyline/ love interest.  Bonnie is strong (notice she throws that grenade at black women.)  and beautiful. So beautiful that nobody equals her and so she should settle for being alone. She’s really complimenting us black women who don’t notice and are too ungrateful for her kindness.

Well I never!

Watch as the conversation progresses and the fans ask her about it, she ups the dosage even further.  She says, “no… with respect.. just no”

See Julie Plec respects the audience. She’s wants us to know that she hears us but she’s truly keeping the “integrity” of bonnie by making her lonely and alone.

But I’m not buying it. I realize this attempt for what it is. She is quickly trying to put angry fans back into the straightjacket before they start a riot and erupt from the halls.

Yes, a la One Flew Over the Cookoos Nest style she has to tamp down on those disturbing ideas black women have to, oh I don’t know, be portrayed as beautiful and desirable.

But this time it isn’t working because I guess some fans came right out and wondered if it was because of her race that the character has been screwed over multiple times in the fandom.  Basically they tried to come right out and say they were being drugged. They suddenly became cognizant.

So what happened? The brute force had to come right out and assisted her in giving black women a lobotomy.

Her henchman, ahem one of the actors, Matt Davis tweeted this.

See the straightjacket and drugs didn’t work. Now they have to have extreme measures. This attempt should probably go into a Black Women Shaming 102 post because that’s what it is.

Now he has to shame the black women who care that the characters that look like them are getting effed continually. (Though he doesn’t note that everyone wants characters that look like them and are represented well otherwise feminists would be happy seeing white men on screen and black men would be happy seeing only white men on screen seeing as they share features.)

In this case the lobotomy is the guilt and shame black women are now facing for “bringing in the race card”

He points out that Jewish people aren’t upset by the character? (Kat Graham is half Jewish)

The point of this is that,  after black women didn’t accept the benevolence “card”  the objective  is to now subdue them BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY. Namely shame. (because black women respond very well to this)

That way they’re such a vegetable after the lobotomy that they don’t know which way is up. They start to doubt. They will (hopefully) start to ask.  “Is this really racist/sexist? Am I just crazy? Am I “playing the race card?” Who knows?  Now the masses of black women are disoriented.

Well played. Matt Davis, Well played.

But I guess the lobotomy didn’t take on me, because I am fully aware of what is going on.  Because this situations plays out so many times in so many situations.

Yes, the f-ery of this situation is enough to make one’s head spin, but let’s keep it moving.


Let’s talk about what I like to call The Iron Man Factor.

Or, “The Blockbuster Factor”

In the Iron Man Factor, I’ve noticed that there have now been many attempts in recent years to give  minorities roles in Super Hero Flicks Such as Iron Man, Avengers , Thor, Etc.

Great new right? You’re probably thinking that this new trend will allow black women to get their own roles, right?

Well, you’d be wrong.

In fact as par for the course, as per usual, All the Women Are White And All the Black Are Men.

While the Don Cheadle’s, Gweyneth Paltrow’s Scartlett Johanson’s and Samuel L. Jackson, have been allowed to expand their use in these new blockbuster films. If you notice, black women have remained largely invisible.

Why am I bringing this up?

Well recently  I went to see the movie ( my family wanted me to) and when talking up the movie one family member mentioned that the movie showed an expanded role for women (ie Pepper Potts saving Tony. I looked blankly at that pronouncement,   simply because I didn’t see how that was relevant to black women, this family member told me it was important because women never get to be the one to save anyone.

So what am I getting at? Well the point is that for the black women part of convincing them, that their “allies” are really benevolent is to convince them that when “they win we all win” theory.

Black women are supposed to think that because Gwyneth Paltrow has a vagina and Samuel L Jackson has brown skin, his success his millions, their roles, their money, their positive images, are really going to help me.

That when Don Cheadle is cast as the best friend. I can jump for joy.

Part of Benevolence is to convince black women that it’s good for me to be in rags while they’ve got riches.

We all know this is not true, but the point of this trick is to get black women to shut up because we secretly believe that they are successful so they can ‘open doors’ for me.

Oh happy days!

The trick is to let black women happily accept it because they think “We’re all in this Together.”

But Like I said in a previous post. This isn’t High School Musical, and the trickle-down theory really ends up bottle-necked with black women having parched throats.

Meanwhile with the Benevolent smoke and mirrors game they end up being the true beneficiaries.

Again, very clever, but I’m not buying it. Because I know that in the end of the trick the image of black women in fandoms never actually changes.

But I will give points for trying.

I have to advise though as I end this post for black women to be on hyper alert as they make buying decisions. Especially that have to do with the media. And ask yourself this.

Are they really in it for me? Or am I just being fed a line so they can benefit?

Until Next Time..


Ps. This Post Is Part of a series.

Next Post:  The Dance Is Over, And You Don’t Owe A Thing : BWiF 104

Previous post:  The Trick Is To MakeYou Think That Everything Has Changed When Really You Haven’t Moved an Inch.

* As always the picture doesn’t belong to me.


30 thoughts on “Ah Benevolance! : The Trick Is to Make You Think It’s For Your Own Good When Really You Wind Up As Empty Handed As Before- BWiF 103

  1. “Part of Benevolence is to convince black women that it’s good for me to be in rags while they’ve got riches.”

    So very true…

    Not sure if you’ve seen the movie “pain and gain” which was another installment from holly wood to completely invisiblize BW. While watching the movie (which I wish I didn’t spend my free movie ticket on) I was SO irritated by the pairing of BM with everyone BUT a BW (or any man in the movie for that matter), and of course the preoccupation of his penis, which was at the heart of the relationship between the only male Black actor and his over weight W wife *eye rolls* *yawn*… But even while irritated by this, I started to ask myself if BM are as irritated by the invisibility of BW in mainstream media or the ways that BW are stereotyped in media. Or if WW care at all about BW’s image. I think the answer to this is a big fat NO, and I think I simply need to research the movies I expose myself too (and financially contribute too) before I continue in MY OWN marignalization. Your posts are so great. keep giving them to us!

    • No. I don’t think that BM care about the invisibility of black women in mainstream media. Its certainly not keeping them up at night. And from the responses by some of them, to black women who complain the answer is that black women are just jealous.

      • Jealous? That is rich coming from a bunch who if they even THINK their egomanic selves are getting excluded from something will whine, cry, moan, riot, go on wildings, do flashmobs and not give anyone ANY peace till they get their way, SMH!

        About this essay, Onelesssoldier thank you again for pointing out how slick these White women can be with their anti-BW/G racism and why they are NO friends of Black women/girls. The bottom line is that Black women & girls need their own specific media catering to them and THEM ALONE. The need for Black female media is just as important/prudent as was the need for Spanish language-media in this country in the 1960s that ultimately led to it’s creation.

        • “Jealous? That is rich coming from a bunch who if they even THINK their egomanic selves are getting excluded from something will whine, cry, moan, riot, go on wildings, do flashmobs and not give anyone ANY peace till they get their way, SMH!”

          Yep. And didn’t some Black men sue ABC because they wanted to be the Bachelor and said it was racist that Black men were never the Bachelor. They never mentioned BW, btw. Surprise surprise. Yet stupid BW will always fighting for BM’s right to other people’s time, attention and rights.

          No Black woman has ever been the Bachelorette, but do you see BW suing over it. Is there anything that Black men won’t do for attention? Don’t they get enough? They’re like WW with darker skin and penises. They’re even bitchy and conceited like WW.

    • Tia, just like Onelesssoldier says, I can assure that the answer to your question of whether or not these Black men care about the invisibility of Black women in mainstream media, is sadly a big fat no. Therefore, I really do not think you or ANY other Black women/girls should give a hoot about how these Black men are portrayed in the media, And frankly lets be honest here, Black males are treated like ROYALTY by the mainstrem media gettng all kinds of plum, positive roles showing them in a positive light. But even if they were not getting that good treatment, since they do not care about you, them you should not care about them right back!

      • Yes Onelesssoldier they did cry their little eyes out and respnd to ABC in that way over there never having been a Black bachelor SMH. What a pathetic bunch of spoiled whiners. And of course they would not mention BW, selfish jerks. Which is why once again I think that Black women & girls should NOT give a hoot about them and their supposed “plight”.

        • Oh, and Onelesssoldier I COMPLETELY agree that Black males & White females=the same, which is to say spolied, selfish, greedy and with MASSIVE entitlement complexes.

    • I noticed that too! Imagine my surprise when I’m reading her blog and click her link and it leads back to my OWN website. I have to say that was totally shocking, but I’m flattered. I’ve been reading her for years.
      Thanks for updating me though!

  2. As usual Khadija laid it down in that post. As you always do, OLS. I am anxiously awaiting your next entry.

    • She sure did Soul Alive. Khadija is one of the trailblazers of the BWE online movement and her readings are a MUST for Black women/girls and anyone who cares for and wants the best for them.

  3. Boom…the first thing I ask whenever I sit down to watching anything is, “WTF does this have to do with me?”

    And thanks for bringing up the invisibility factor because while roles for (white) women ARE expanding (or at least…what they might consider expanding), the stubborn absence of Black women is patent.

    • I’m gonna put a disclaimer that my comment isn’t about de-railing this blog. I’m gonna make my point. Just listen.

      I’m a huge fan of Indian cinema. The thing that eats me up is that the vast majority of women in the movies (except for “parallel cinema”) are so light skinned. So I stopped watching. Their so called “dusky beauties” really aren’t that dark skinned in the first place, and they have to be way prettier than the average fair girl. Priyanka Chopra, Bipasha Basu, Chitrangada Singh, Deepika Paudukone were never really that dark in the first place, and they are bleaching their skin. However Indian women are supposed to be so grateful for these women. The darkest out the bunch, Bipasha, gets the most horrible roles. She isn’t getting the same treatment as half-white Katrina Kaif.

      However when Frieda Pinto bucked the system with Slumdog Millionaire, and a bunch of other movies. A lot of Indians were PISSED even though they benefited! However Dev Patel was never blamed for that movie, nor was he ever treated the way she was. In India Freida is considered a plain jane, and her skin is considered too dark (bull). This angered lots of people in the industry who have been trying to get their family’s foot into Hollywood, and failed.

      In India it is understood that certain things go a certain way. So when girls like Freida comes along they get real mad. Girls like her will teach other dark skinned Indian women that they don’t have to put up with the current system, and they can take their business elsewhere.

      The strange thing is that her presence in international film benefits them, but no. They refuse. These women would rather stay in their own mental prison. Looking from the outside in I’m glad I’m not them.

      This is why I love this blog post. This is why I love the women around BWE. We’ve figured it out! We realize that this okey doke must stop. We don’t have to fall for the same tactics anymore. We have the power.


      • I don’t think you’re derailing. I think this is a good way to point out a situation that is similar to black women and how bad it has gotten for them. Similar to how bad it continues to get for us unless we nip it in the bud now.

    • @Ankhesen Mié

      Regarding the invisibility factor. i felt i had to point it out because I keep hearing how *awesome* these new expanded roles yet these same people don’t even see how it never benefits them.

  4. Considering how obvious the racial bias against Blacks on Vampire Diaries is — we are all witches, btw — I was not surprised by the posts you displayed. It’s why I stopped watching the show years ago. I don’t need weekly doses of “Green Mile” syndrome seeping into my brain.

    I was surprised that anyone would be stupid enough to try and make the dissatisfaction with Bonnie’s romantic life, or lack thereof, about the Jewish faith/people. How ridiculous! The show is not about religion, and I’m sure when people see the actress who plays Bonnie they do not see a White/Jewish woman. Frankly, I’m shocked she’s directly mixed. I never would have guessed it, because she is darker than me and I have two Black parents. Not sure why they thought that revelation would quell the discontent among Black and other viewers who want to see Bonnie in a satisfying relationship. She’s a very beautiful young woman and, in real life, she’s be getting more looks and men than Caroline and Elena combined. Maybe that is why the show runner feels compelled to keep her asexual and non-threatening to the WW characters.

    In season two they put her with Jeremy, but broke it up a few eps later with a ridiculous story line about him being in love with the ghost of a vampire. 🙄 Cause you know how horny teen boys love undead things they can’t have sex with or even kiss. 😆

    I was done. Haven’t watched a single episode of that ridiculous show since.

    Great post! I think far too many BW actually buy into the bull that they are too “strong” to need or want a loving relationship. Shows like Vampire Diaries seek to reinforce that nonsensical belief. NO ONE is so “strong” that they don’t require love and companionship to be happy. it’s just plain foolish to pretend otherwise!

    • Yah the really did her dirty. And you know I was in a fandom this week for another show on tumblr and found some girls there complaining about this weeks episode. Apperantly they killed bonnie off. Now people aren’t sure if she’s going to be in the next season or try and bring her back. Lol I too knew that show was bad news for the black women characters and decided to forgoe it completely.

      • Can’t say I’m surprised to hear they finally rid themselves of the lone Black woman character on VD. Typical.

        I just hope that the actress who played Bonnie gets a far better role in the very near future. She deserves it. She’s a great actress.

  5. Ironically, I went to see Iron man 3 and I was just thinking that whether it’s the enemy or hero, Black women are a anomaly on the screen.

    It just seems that way for them from action shows,prime time shows and some jive reality shows. Look at Dancing With The Stars. Sure,you have seen Black men have won (athletes mainly), yet, no matter how good Black women have danced on there,the judges seemed to always find a way for them to lose. This year another Black woman appears promising to win,but I’m not banking on it. I’ll be surprised if she do win.

    You mention The Bachelor? That show is another example of Black women being absent Case in point: the last show that they had could have helped them score some diversity points. Although there was diverse range of contestants on that show and the guy (Sean Lowe) said that he had dated Black women,for some “mysterious” reason the 4 chosen Black contestants didn’t last on there(Of course they wanted them to look bad as one of them got in trouble for DUI). I’ve also read where another Black woman wanted to appear on there and people petitioned for her to be on there,but ABC didn’t consider her for the show. I guess god don’t like ugly.The bachelorette that Sean chose is said to be having problems with her, though they deny it….lol! Far as the Black woman,she’s being blessed with offers. Sean probably wished that he would have gotten to know her.

    • Yah i remember the lawsuit. And i remember how black women were nowhere mentioned. I also heard how “coincidental” it was that the black women were off after one episode. Classic. Yet another reason why I don’t watch that show.

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  7. I would also like to mention the hypocrisy of Julie Plec because she paired up Caroline with the “murderous” vampire Klaus smh.

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